Hillary Clinton: Soon to be the first US president in history suffering from sleep deprivation?

It’s 3 a.m… again… Apparently it’s always 3 a.m. in Hillary Rodham Clinton’s fantasy world as president. At least if you watch her campaign’s just released “Hillary is ready on day one and especially in the middle of the night” spot, Part Deux.

The Clinton campaign has unveiled a follow-up 30-second television commercial to the previous controversial “Red Phone” ad that ran in Ohio and Texas. The voice-over begins, “It’s 3 a.m. and your children are safe and asleep…but there’s a phone ringing in the White House…” But while the first ad played on fears of a world crisis (a direct dig at Barack Obama’s perceived inexperience), the second ad focuses on a domestic financial fiasco…and attacks John McCain. An odd target when you think about it when she hasn’t even bothered to beat Barack Obama thus far.

An element of the spot’s audio is the somewhat torturous sound of a telephone ringing incessantly throughout the spot until Hillary answers and apparently saves the day. Ring… ring…. ring… Like a maddening moment from a Jerry Lewis Labor Day telethon phone room. After watching only a few seconds of the spot, one is tempted to scream, “Will someone please answer that damn phone?” And someone of course does—and that someone is Hillary Rodham Clinton–dressed exactly the same in both ads.

But is Hillary really ready to serve as our nation’s next leader? Fending off financial meltdowns and international emergencies and God knows what else? Apparently her campaign wants us to believe so. Is America really ready for a sleep-deprived, habitually lying, always dressed and ready—even at 3 a.m.—Hillary, to answer that rudely ringing telephone with such vim and vigor?

When on earth does this women sleep? When she does will she hang upside down from the ceiling of the Oval Office during the day? Is she nocturnal? She must be. She’s always up at 3 a.m. We certainly know that her husband apparently is comfortable operating at night. Perhaps that is why she is up, dressed, and ready for confrontation in the wee hours of the morning. Waiting for the roaming Gnome that is known as the former president to drift back from an evening’s escapades to his beloved Hillary who is on-duty at home base, A.K.A. 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Even more disturbing…does she own more than one outfit of clothing? If so, why is she wearing the same attire in both spots? Can’t she run down the hallway to Chelsea’s room and borrow a change of clothing? A T-shirt? A sweatshirt? Something? Or send one of her mindless minions over to the nearest Wal-Mart to fetch a fitting new set of duds? After all, she lived in Arkansas for a number of year, headquarters to Wal-Mart, she must have shopped there once or twice for something “pretty.”

Or is the fearful world in Hillary’s commercial just having one hell of an exceptionally bad evening and everything is coming unraveled at the same time—at 3 a.m.? If that’s the case, I don’t want to see just Hillary on that phone, I want to see the entire cabinet huddled around Hillary’s broad shoulders, offering expert advice and endless experience. If she can’t correctly remember whether or not she was shot at in Bosnia, how can she be trusted to remember all of the important details being given to her from the person on the other end of that phone line?

“Worldwide panic on line one, Mrs. Clinton.” “And don’t forget you’ve got an economic eruption on line two…” “Plus you still have that taxi driver waiting on line three who wants to know who is going to pay him for dropping Mr. Clinton off at the front gate a few minutes ago?”

It’s all enough to make you want to unplug that overworked telephone, shut off your brain, and instead watch a rerun of The West Wing. Which should be easy when we’re all wide-awake at 3 a.m. worrying about that damn ringing phone and wondering what’s going to happen when she hangs it up?